JORDAN.

after going for the post-mortem concert meeting yesterday, it made me think that i'm going to miss so many things that the choir will be having.

anyway, i should be that glad that the choir is in good hands now! :)

still thinking whether if i should come back and help, but the thoughts of it draining my weekdays are such a pain.

i need to start writing affirmation notes to each choir member soon. ahah.

to go or not to go?

oh, i shall wait for this month or next month's pay to get a guitar and try to learn guitar soon. hehehehehehe. seeing how someone could play the guitar so well makes me feel like learning too. argh. guitar lessons please anyone! :D

it's true



the chalet was pretty nice.

even though i went quite late, but i could see the fun each other have and it's the company that brings the choir together.

sadly that I wouldn't be able to enjoy all these benefits anymore.

don't know why i'm feeling so emo lately. maybe because i really didnt try hard to know her enough. maybe it was too sudden. maybe i'm not even prepared for it.

i don't know if i should continue going for choir.

maybes maybes and maybes. when will it ever be confirmed? chances of me getting in a relationship during secondary school was so minimal since i was so obsessed with gaming that time, and that could probably be the cause of it.

i never had the heart or the guts to ever ask a girl out for lunch or dinner, or even have a simple phone conversation. to think that i told myself when i was young that being in a relationship in secondary school days wasn't raelly a good thing since my mindset that time was always prioritised on studying.

afterall, who even likes me?

can't stop thinking about you girl



the concert is over!

everything went well i think. seats were mostly filled up in the auditorium and all of us had fun. managed to view some of the feedback they gave and they thought that the concert was too short. but i'd say that this would be a stepping stone and hopefully more will come in the future. at least i'm free from this choir and probably have no intentions of going back again.

oh well, at least i tried for it.

and i think i need to start losing weight and start exercising! argh.

music of the night



some recollection of a dream that i had a few days ago.

went for some wedding dinner with a few friends. somehow i managed to see the chef trying to poison the bride or something. once i saw that chef, the chef immediately started giving chase on me and i started running. i started running and running and somehow we ran into some deserted building.

out of nowhere i had some invisible powers and i managed to turn invisible before the chef would notice me. after trying to escape, i managed to find under a flight a stairs and my invisible powers started to wear off. i heard some footsteps coming near me, and i start panicking, hoping that my invisible powers could come back. and it did! starting running out again and..... riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing! my alarm rang.

oh well.

concert's tomorrow! hopefully it'll go smoothly and hopefully i'll be able to do it, and hopefully dare to go for it. heh

and somehow she seems to be a star in my mind

neorago



life can be so unpredictable. heard from dj that a friend passed away due to some bone marrow thingy. the thing that shocked me is that he is only 17. oh my.

recently i've been getting sharp pain in my knee joints and sometimes when i wake up i get numbness in my knee joints too. i wonder if anything's gonna happen on me...

lots of birthday present debts to clear, lots of things that i want to buy and lots of things that i want to do, but i just don't have the time, don't have the money, and don't have the attitude for them.

and history repeats again.

i'm a loner



The Old Man and the Starfish

One fine warm day, a tourist was walking down a sandy, tropical beach. He noticed as he was walking that the tide had brought in a lot of starfish. Continuing his walk, he started looking at the starfish and their pretty colours.

Since he was a conscientious man, he also was paying attention to where he was going. He noticed a shape off in the distance. He couldn't tell what it was at first, but as his walk progressed and he came nearer to this shape, it transformed itself into an old native of the island. This old man, he could tell, was walking towards him, but at a very slow pace.

The reason for the pace of the old man became appearent as the two came nearer to each other. The old man was also looking at the starfish, but he was also doing more. He was picking up those he found and throwing back out to sea. Eventually, because they were walking towards each other, the two men met.

"Why are you throwing the starfish back into the sea?" asked the tourist of the old man.

"Starfish die if they're out of the seawater for too long." replied the old native. "I do this every day on my walk."

Ever the practical man, the tourist said, "It's a godo thing to do, but do you know how many starfish there must be washed up on this beach every day? You can't possibly make a dent in that. What possible difference can you make in an effort to save starfish?"

The old man bent down, picked up another starfish and threw it out into the sea. He then turned towards the tourist, and said, "It made a difference to that one."

Went through the affirmation notes that I received during LLTC in secondary school and it somehow made me feel alot happier. Oh well, I guess I shouldn't brood over things that I don't have control over anymore.

choir's concert is next week, and then it'll be time to say goodbye, heh.

run devil devil run run



i just feel like sleeping everyday. must sleep all i can.

talking to justin the other night sure made me feel better alot, and at leat it helped me decide what i needed to do.

but after all that thoughts, i don't know whether if i should continue pursuing for that person. ahhh.

like whoa



it's been one year since i did my jaw surgery, and the numbess on my left chin is still there! now i'm highly thinking that it will be a permanent numbness. =(

how i wished the cow would stop ignoring me so that I'd have someone to talk to.



hero



what a busy week with school and work.

just some summaries that happened this week.


pased my ftt on the second try. time to start driving soooooon! but i wonder if i have the time if i were to learn driving after work or something. then again i feel like trying to go to the swim or something too. HAHAHAHAHAHA

and.

Academic Standing: COMPLETED COURSE OF STUDY FOR THE DIPLOMA IN INFO-COMMUNICATIONS (E0F-07)


YAY! i should be happy that i can gradute, but i shouldn't be happy that since chances of going uni for me is very very low.

ohwell. time to celebrate for a while i guess, in a lonely, lonely world of my own.

i suddenly feel that everything is all my fault.

through the rain



first week of work seems pretty good. guess more workload will come when one of them goes for maternity leave.

i guess the exam results are out next week! oh my.

you mean



i just realised that

the first girl that i said i liked her was on vday 4 years ago.

how coincidental.

breathing underwater



met up with fik and jundong after a long time. we shared lots of stories of each other and how we missed about the times that we had during secondary school. we also talked about love stories and how the three of us are always undecisive, especially when it comes to love.

as for mine, there's someone whom i've feelings for. but i never had the heart to tell her. and since i'm graduating soon, maybe i won't have the chance to express it to her at all. oh man.

also, i'm suddenly so motivated to gym looking at fik's physique, but the feeling seems to be there sometimes, and sometimes it isn't.

all i know is that, if you really were to try for it. it will work out for you.

someone teach me the piano or guitar please!

to more than i can be



filing, filing and filing.

time to work for four months before i can rest for enlistment, that's if it doesn't come earlier than that :x

hope that i'll be able to learn something from these few months.

swoon

swear like a sailor