JORDAN.

2 more weeks of working and time for me to rest.

i wanted to stop one week earlier but they are pretty shorthanded. sigh.

to me i think 2 weeks of rest isn't enough! i think i need more time to rest and to do things that i want to do. the thing is, i don't want what i want to do! =/

time to start running and exercising a lil bit to prepare myself for ptp and bmt. heard from a friend that the coy that i might go to seems quite relaxed as compared to another one. ireally hope it is. =/

afterall, i hope i won't get into bad company. nonononno please.

time to wait for the graduation ceremony!

five colours in her hair



counting down to 3rd june! =(

crush on you



no sign of any enlistment letter yet.

should have read the signs



taking the safe road all the time isn't a good thing afterall. one must learn how to take risks at sometimes.

the thing is that i never dared to make any risks. sigh.

maybe what uncle henry said was true. i also don't know why i would break down after hearing comments about me. maybe i was too sensitive nowadays and couldn't really think much about anything else.

when i saw my friends that have passed their TP, it made me feel how weak and useless i am for not being able to continue my lessons. although uncle henry kept saying that if i were to ccalm my nervers i'd be a good driver, but sometimes these things can never be controlled. :/

some of my friends have already received their enlistment letter. ohno.

sighsighsigh. when will i ever gain my self confidence?! someone please guide me.

life



i feel so regretful that i don't have the confidence to learn up my driving.

i don't know if i made a correct decision. but every night i'll keep thinking about it and can't sleep at all. -_-

maybe i'm not even suitable to learn driving at all. =/

or could it be just the instructor only?

one world one dream



i'm going to stop learning driving for now.

that's it.



went for russell's 21st birthday yesterday at aranda country club. it seems like he invited alot of people, mostly his armymates i guess. somehow after attending his birthday chalet. it suddenly made me think of alot of things. things that i've never actually get to enjoy.

i realised that his close friends have helped him alot in this celebration. the fun of close firneds, going out together for meals and outings. these are just the simple things that i'll never get to enjoy.

sometimes i tell myself that i didn't make full use of my poly life. i regretted not signing up for those freshmen camps because i was too antisocial.

now to think about it, if i ever have a chance to hold my 21st, i don't really know who to invite. sigh.

and i lost the motivation and mood to continue learning driving already. =( oh man. i'm feeling emo again. argh

i will survive



i broke out after yesterday's driving lesson. and at that point of time, i wanted to give up.

but i realised that i can't stop and have to continue and continue. i need to change my mindset that i can do it.

walked around a guitar shop yesterday after work and found that the prices seemed quite reasonable to me. the only thing left is just whether if i have the attitude to even learn it.

graduation in may 18!

and i do hope she can forgive me.

is this true



took my first driving lesson today!

it was so scary. all i know from the tutor is that i applied too much force on the accelerator and the brakes and releasing the clutch too fast. i almost banged a car too! HEHEHEHEHEHEHE.

however during the midst of today's lessons i had the thoughts of not learning driving anymore. ahhh. but in the end, the tutor said that i'm a fast learner.

the tutor said that if i were to take lessons just once a week i wouldn't have enough time to take the test. since i'm more or less expecting to enlist in june. hopefully i'd have enough time for lessons and be able to take the test in june before i enlist.

now hopefully the company will let me go work later on some weekdays so that i can take some lessons in the weekdays.

but, the thought of booking the test and after that when the enlistment letter comes, the feeling is so.... gah.


sorry sorry

swear like a sailor