no surprise here
JORDAN.
Friday, June 29, 2012
Is it wrong to always be a follower?
maybe it is. i dont know. it could probably mean that i have no perspective in life. or i should say control.
like how i always feel is that as much as i do not want to be a burden of other people, i do somehow feel that people will think im a weak person. am i really one or am i just hiding too much to myself?
i feel enjoyable with the company that i like. esp with people that i find it comfortable. the countless advice they gave to me. the advice on directions of life or how to make me a better person. but somehow i neber really paid attention to them and i really really regret not following them.
am i being too gentle? or am i too afraid to do so many things?
i remember during sec sch that gan was really nice to me. or i shld say i had a fun time hanging out with him. though some of the jokes were like crap or maybe erotic, he was still a pretty nice person. maybe if i followed his advice and keep doing oushups daoly i would probably get ippt gold liao. LOL
in tp both of us wanted to join dragonboat but we droped out after the first day of traonong. those were the days.
i think im too used to going out alone or being alone. whenever i go oit with friends sometime i dont really know how to start topics etc.
its like the same on how my short relationship didnt work that well too. i guess i was too suibian. i think i need to have more self confodence and make decisions at the rigbt time.
i feel grateful for such friends for spending some of their time eith me. maybe i think too lowly of myself and treated everything like theu are better than me.
i dont know if anyone reads this blog amymore, but this avenue of expressing myself seems to help me destress or to keep track on whether if i have improved myself over the past years. i think its almost six to seven years already sknce i started vlpfgong. time sure fly.
shall keep other comments for future post. this eems to be wuite lpng haha! and the amount of spelling errors too -.-
1:59 PM
Monday, June 25, 2012
I realised I am too clingy towards people. They somehow bring happiness to me. Or I should say that they are someone I can really trust and talk to. But it's like a bad thing cuz I don't really talk a lot too. Or I should say that sometimes I don't know how to talk about. It feels kinda outcasted at times... I also realised that somehow or other I never really like hanging out with groups that I'm in. Maybe it's like their are other groups that I prefer hanging out because of similar interests. Duringy poly days I wasn't really close to my care group as compared to others. But it feels weird because sometimes you don't always blend in with them. Even during army life the same thing happens again. Will it happen again during uni? :/
6:34 AM
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
i wondered how my google suddenly turned into chinese. ohmytian.
job hunting never seemed so bad before. i suddenly felt i did the wrong thing.
although i'm in serious need of money to buy the neverending wants of my list, there are some jobs that i wouldnt really want to do :/
shld i reject a job that has been offered to me?
not that im really interested but its more of just filling up the space you know. :/
again and again
10:07 AM
Monday, June 11, 2012
the end is here.
went back to camp with a pretty heavy heart because the thing that i hated doing when it first started has come to an end.
you know, the dreaded national service that i wish it didnt started 2 years ago to a nice memory 2 years later that i wish it didnt ended.
from the wonderful days of falcon where i've met great people to share the start of the journey with me till the days i ended with another great bunch of people in dragon.
from that wonderful first day of 48 where i have to tear my own pillow's plastic covering and bed too. had to wash away the construction dust from the bathrooms too, to the remaining days of my journey in the rundown town of 42.
i am really going to miss those days.
i s till remembered how this journey started with a bad turn in relationship. maybe i wasnt really prepared that time.
it really felt like there wasn't really many problems in the army. such carefree life, no problems, not much stress from the outside world.
i can't really think of what t owrite since this has been a draft for almost a week LOL.
but i'm in dire need of cash. :(
think i'll remove that stupid shoutbox since it keeps getting spammed -.- not like it will affect much since i doubt there are many viewers now HAHA
never let you go
10:11 AM
may the force be with you
after tomorrow but before today
July 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 June 2012 July 2012 September 2012 October 2012 November 2012 December 2012 January 2013 February 2013 March 2013 April 2013 May 2013 June 2013 July 2013 August 2013 October 2013 November 2013 January 2014 February 2014 March 2014 April 2014 June 2014 August 2014 September 2014 October 2014 December 2014 February 2015 March 2015 April 2015 May 2015 June 2015 July 2015 August 2015 September 2015 January 2016 February 2016 March 2016 May 2016 June 2016 August 2016
you owe me a cookie
Designer
DancingSheep
Resources
x
swear like a sailor